I'm 16, 17 in a few weeks and I really want to have a baby. I know I'm young and that it's really hard and everything but I just couldn't stop thinking about it. My boyfriend and I have been together for three years and he has a stable job (he is 17, will be 18 in a few months). He is completely okay with it and I just love babies and kids. I know it's hard and all that but I can't wait to have kids. I might even possibly be pregnant now! Anyway, I guess I just need some advice. What do you think I should do? I know people usually say don't do it but I thought I'd see if anybody had a different perspective and if you don't, why do you think I shouldn't? I don't think it's really much different than when you are, like, 30. It all depends on your maturity and I know I am very mature.
I'm NOT a troll. Please just answer my question. I really want to know what to do as I would love to have a baby but I know it could lead to a lot of people having issues with me.
Answer
Consider the following:
Can you afford the essentials- (And this is just for a newborn)-LOTS of diapers/wipes, formula/breastfeeding pump kit, bottles, pacifiers, clothes, socks, booties, hats, blankets, carseat/carrier, crib or bassinet, diaper bag, and the list goes on. This stuff gets really expensive, just look at some prices online.
If you're not done with highschool, how are you going to finish it? If you don't finish HS, how are you going to get a good job to support this child?
If you broke up with your boyfriend, and you were depending on his income, how will you support yourself and your baby? Would you have to quit school? Would you have to work multiple minimum wage jobs or even end up relying on welfare?
If you guys broke up, what would be the custody arrangements? You have to think about this even if it's unpleasant. Would he be completely absent from the child's life, leaving you with all the work? Would he want complete or the majority of custody?
If your baby was born with a disability or illness, would you be able to handle that? Could you take the extra financial and emotionall toll?
Could you afford health care for this child? What about unexpected medical issues, could you handle the stress of that?
Who is going to get up in the middle of the night when the baby is crying to feed him/change him/clean up his puke/rock him back to sleep?
Could you maintain your temper if you were going on one hour of sleep from the previous night and your colicky baby wouldn't stop screaming for no apparent reason?
If your child were sick, who would be expected to stay home and take care of him or her? Would you always be the one expected to drop your plans or work responsibilites?
Would you be okay with it if your BF went out with his friends and left you home with the baby or vice versa or would you need to agree not to do that?
If you didn't work and stayed home with the baby all day (as many new moms do aka maternity leave) would you expect your BF to do all of the housework or would he complain if he came home from work and the house was a mess?
If you did work or tried to go to school, would you be expecting parents or other relatives to help with babysitting? How do they feel about that? If not, can you afford daycare? That gets really expensive!
What if, God forbid, something happened to you or your boyfriend, is there somebody you could trust to take care of your child and raise them the way you would want them to be raised?
Are you expecting your parents/family to help you out, either physically or financially? Are they willing to do so?
How would you handle the finances? If your boyfriend is the only one earning money, will he be okay with you using his money to get whatever you think you want/need for yourself or the baby? Would he expect you to give an explanation for everything or talk it over first?
Do you even have your own place? Do you have enough space where you live to start a family? If not, can you afford to move?
Do you have a form of transportation? Besides everyday use, such as getting to work, this could be important for things like taking Baby to the doctor or running for things like formula or diapers that you would need right away if you ran out.
Do you and your boyfriend have different opinions on how the child should be raised? For example, are you on the same page about whether or not a child should get spanked as a form of punishment? Or, when it would be a good age for your child to start dating?
Were you ever given the take-home baby assignment in school? If you were and you couldn't take care of an egg or a baby doll for a weekend how can you handle the responsibilty of a human life for at least 18 years?
What if you ended up with twins? Are you still willing to accept the responsibility or would you all of a sudden not want one or both of your children?
Are you prepared for the pain and inconveniences of pregnancy/childbirth/child rearing?
Have you thought about why you really want a kid? If they're not what you expected or you aren't really going to get what you're looking for out of being a parent, can you still provide a loving home for him?
Are you capable of being a single parent if you had to?
Have you had enough time to become and individual and are you ready to start putting your child first?
How is your BF going to handle being a dad? Have you really had enough time to build a solid relationship and do you guys know absolutely everything about each other? Are there unexpected things in either of your lives that could cause your relationship to become unstable? Do you really think that both of your values won't change as you get older?
Consider the following:
Can you afford the essentials- (And this is just for a newborn)-LOTS of diapers/wipes, formula/breastfeeding pump kit, bottles, pacifiers, clothes, socks, booties, hats, blankets, carseat/carrier, crib or bassinet, diaper bag, and the list goes on. This stuff gets really expensive, just look at some prices online.
If you're not done with highschool, how are you going to finish it? If you don't finish HS, how are you going to get a good job to support this child?
If you broke up with your boyfriend, and you were depending on his income, how will you support yourself and your baby? Would you have to quit school? Would you have to work multiple minimum wage jobs or even end up relying on welfare?
If you guys broke up, what would be the custody arrangements? You have to think about this even if it's unpleasant. Would he be completely absent from the child's life, leaving you with all the work? Would he want complete or the majority of custody?
If your baby was born with a disability or illness, would you be able to handle that? Could you take the extra financial and emotionall toll?
Could you afford health care for this child? What about unexpected medical issues, could you handle the stress of that?
Who is going to get up in the middle of the night when the baby is crying to feed him/change him/clean up his puke/rock him back to sleep?
Could you maintain your temper if you were going on one hour of sleep from the previous night and your colicky baby wouldn't stop screaming for no apparent reason?
If your child were sick, who would be expected to stay home and take care of him or her? Would you always be the one expected to drop your plans or work responsibilites?
Would you be okay with it if your BF went out with his friends and left you home with the baby or vice versa or would you need to agree not to do that?
If you didn't work and stayed home with the baby all day (as many new moms do aka maternity leave) would you expect your BF to do all of the housework or would he complain if he came home from work and the house was a mess?
If you did work or tried to go to school, would you be expecting parents or other relatives to help with babysitting? How do they feel about that? If not, can you afford daycare? That gets really expensive!
What if, God forbid, something happened to you or your boyfriend, is there somebody you could trust to take care of your child and raise them the way you would want them to be raised?
Are you expecting your parents/family to help you out, either physically or financially? Are they willing to do so?
How would you handle the finances? If your boyfriend is the only one earning money, will he be okay with you using his money to get whatever you think you want/need for yourself or the baby? Would he expect you to give an explanation for everything or talk it over first?
Do you even have your own place? Do you have enough space where you live to start a family? If not, can you afford to move?
Do you have a form of transportation? Besides everyday use, such as getting to work, this could be important for things like taking Baby to the doctor or running for things like formula or diapers that you would need right away if you ran out.
Do you and your boyfriend have different opinions on how the child should be raised? For example, are you on the same page about whether or not a child should get spanked as a form of punishment? Or, when it would be a good age for your child to start dating?
Were you ever given the take-home baby assignment in school? If you were and you couldn't take care of an egg or a baby doll for a weekend how can you handle the responsibilty of a human life for at least 18 years?
What if you ended up with twins? Are you still willing to accept the responsibility or would you all of a sudden not want one or both of your children?
Are you prepared for the pain and inconveniences of pregnancy/childbirth/child rearing?
Have you thought about why you really want a kid? If they're not what you expected or you aren't really going to get what you're looking for out of being a parent, can you still provide a loving home for him?
Are you capable of being a single parent if you had to?
Have you had enough time to become and individual and are you ready to start putting your child first?
How is your BF going to handle being a dad? Have you really had enough time to build a solid relationship and do you guys know absolutely everything about each other? Are there unexpected things in either of your lives that could cause your relationship to become unstable? Do you really think that both of your values won't change as you get older?
bearded dragon care sheet?
Q. what is the best bearded dragon care sheet you can give me be as specific as possible im housing an adult bearded dragon whoever gives me the best caresheet i will give you best answer and you will get 10 extra points please reply asap thanks(:
Answer
Here's a bearded dragon essentials check list:
1) UVB lighting; Zoomed makes the best long tube style fluorescent UVB bulb to date, and T-rex makes the best MVB (mercury vapor bulb) on the market to date. MVBs will emit heat and UVB light all in one bulb. Other wise UVB light and heat will be two separate bulbs. Bulbs should be changed according to the manufacturers recommendation (usually every 6 - 12 months) after which time UVB will no longer be produced even if visible light still is. UVB is important to a diurnal (active during the day) reptile's metabolism, food digestion, and absorption of calcium.
2) Heating. The basking temp (warmest temp in the enclosure) should be 110 - 115 F for babies, and 95 F for adults. Basking temp should be available for 10 - 12 hours a day. As long as your home is in the 70's F at night, you do not need any extra heat source. You will need a temp gauge to tell you if you have it right. Do not guess. Digital gauges are the most accurate.
3) Decor. Beardeds love to be close to the lights, so having thick branches, like drift wood, fake or real, to climb to be closer to the light is a good idea. Other than that, it's all aesthetics.
4) Substrate. No loose substrate should be used; beardies and leopard geckos are prone to impaction caused by ingestion of loose substrate, like sand. Using things like Repti-carpet, non adhesive shelf liner, butcher paper, paper towel, slate rock, and, my favorite, textured ceramic tile are safer alternatives.
5) Beardeds are omnivores; they need both veggie and "meat" in their diet for complete nutrition. The diet should shift as the beardie grows. For example, a baby should have a 80% meat and 20% veggie diet, a juvenile should have a a 50/50 diet, and an adult should have 80% veggie and 20% meat diet.
http://www.beautifuldragons.503xtreme.com/Nutritionframeset.html
Good "meat" sources are: feeder insects (like crickets, phoenix worms, horn worms, silk worms, red wrigglers, night crawlers, meal worms (occasionally; their outer shell is hard to digest), and wax worms (occasionally; they are mostly fat), cooked unseasoned chicken, turkey, and beef heart, and tuna (in water, not oil). You can also buy pelleted food, but do not feed exclusively; it is not a complete diet.
As to how many or how much to feed, it depends in the age and size of the beardie; a baby needs to be fed several times (at least twice) a day, and they will be doing A LOT of growing, and an adult doesn't necessarily need to be fed every single day.
6) Calcium supplementation. Using a cuttle bone, which is essentially plain calcium powder, (just shave down into a powder) sprinkled on the salad items several times a week or coating feeder insects are the methods of ingestion. Plain calcium powder can be fed as often as you like. Calcium with vitamin D3 added should not be fed too often because the turtle can overdose on D3.
7) Enclosure. If you get a baby you will need to buy progressively larger enclosures. An adult female bearded will grow to an average of 16 - 18 inches and will need a minimum 40 gallon breeder tank (3ft x 1.5ft x 1.5 ft), and an adult male will grow to an average of 19 - 24 inches and will need a minimum of a 55 gallon tank (4 ft x 1 ft x 2 ft), although a 75 gallon (4ft X 1.5ft X 2 ft) would be more comfortable.
8) A small water dish should be available. You may rarely see the bearded drink, as they are very good at getting water from the food that they eat, but water should be available just in case.
Here's a bearded dragon essentials check list:
1) UVB lighting; Zoomed makes the best long tube style fluorescent UVB bulb to date, and T-rex makes the best MVB (mercury vapor bulb) on the market to date. MVBs will emit heat and UVB light all in one bulb. Other wise UVB light and heat will be two separate bulbs. Bulbs should be changed according to the manufacturers recommendation (usually every 6 - 12 months) after which time UVB will no longer be produced even if visible light still is. UVB is important to a diurnal (active during the day) reptile's metabolism, food digestion, and absorption of calcium.
2) Heating. The basking temp (warmest temp in the enclosure) should be 110 - 115 F for babies, and 95 F for adults. Basking temp should be available for 10 - 12 hours a day. As long as your home is in the 70's F at night, you do not need any extra heat source. You will need a temp gauge to tell you if you have it right. Do not guess. Digital gauges are the most accurate.
3) Decor. Beardeds love to be close to the lights, so having thick branches, like drift wood, fake or real, to climb to be closer to the light is a good idea. Other than that, it's all aesthetics.
4) Substrate. No loose substrate should be used; beardies and leopard geckos are prone to impaction caused by ingestion of loose substrate, like sand. Using things like Repti-carpet, non adhesive shelf liner, butcher paper, paper towel, slate rock, and, my favorite, textured ceramic tile are safer alternatives.
5) Beardeds are omnivores; they need both veggie and "meat" in their diet for complete nutrition. The diet should shift as the beardie grows. For example, a baby should have a 80% meat and 20% veggie diet, a juvenile should have a a 50/50 diet, and an adult should have 80% veggie and 20% meat diet.
http://www.beautifuldragons.503xtreme.com/Nutritionframeset.html
Good "meat" sources are: feeder insects (like crickets, phoenix worms, horn worms, silk worms, red wrigglers, night crawlers, meal worms (occasionally; their outer shell is hard to digest), and wax worms (occasionally; they are mostly fat), cooked unseasoned chicken, turkey, and beef heart, and tuna (in water, not oil). You can also buy pelleted food, but do not feed exclusively; it is not a complete diet.
As to how many or how much to feed, it depends in the age and size of the beardie; a baby needs to be fed several times (at least twice) a day, and they will be doing A LOT of growing, and an adult doesn't necessarily need to be fed every single day.
6) Calcium supplementation. Using a cuttle bone, which is essentially plain calcium powder, (just shave down into a powder) sprinkled on the salad items several times a week or coating feeder insects are the methods of ingestion. Plain calcium powder can be fed as often as you like. Calcium with vitamin D3 added should not be fed too often because the turtle can overdose on D3.
7) Enclosure. If you get a baby you will need to buy progressively larger enclosures. An adult female bearded will grow to an average of 16 - 18 inches and will need a minimum 40 gallon breeder tank (3ft x 1.5ft x 1.5 ft), and an adult male will grow to an average of 19 - 24 inches and will need a minimum of a 55 gallon tank (4 ft x 1 ft x 2 ft), although a 75 gallon (4ft X 1.5ft X 2 ft) would be more comfortable.
8) A small water dish should be available. You may rarely see the bearded drink, as they are very good at getting water from the food that they eat, but water should be available just in case.
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